Skip to main content

No results found

Waterperry web banner fxs4dz
Culture, Comedy, Knowledge, Perspectives

Idle Chat

Bruce Windwood

divider
Bruce Windwood by Andrew Love
© Andrew Love

I am part of a silent minority. For unlike some of the other more vociferous minorities, I doubt you would have heard much, if anything, about me and my ilk. This is generally because we can’t be arsed to engage with the world and explain ourselves. Far too exhausting.

I am an idler.

There we go – I’ve said it now. I’ve fallen out of the metaphorical closet (after a very pleasant snooze nestled in amongst the cosy winter coats) and landed, rather conveniently, on a comfy sofa drenched in summer sunlight and stuffed full of squishy cushions. From this position of languid repose, I shall continue. Or fall asleep. For even metaphors can make you drowsy if you are of an idle disposition.

Anyway. Idlers. What are they good for?

Well – according to Hitler, the Elizabethans, the Victorians, William Beveridge, and the Department for Work and Pensions: absolutely bugger all. According to this lot, idlers are a septic blight and cancerous blotch on the otherwise hardworking landscape of human endeavour. Ouch. That’s me told.

My fellow idlers and I, however, beg to differ. In fact, we think that being idle is a very wholesome and worthwhile pursuit; as long as this pursuit is undertaken at a steady leisurely pace with regular intervals to drink tea, lean on things, eat biscuits, lie on things, eat more biscuits and take luxuriating naps in sun-kissed grassy hollows.

Actually, I would go even further and declare (perhaps rather boldly) that being an idler can help save the world. No really. By doing less, you consume less. By consuming less, you don’t gobble up all of nature’s bounty in one sitting and then wonder why there are only three bees, a tired looking yak and a couple of Yucca plants left on the planet.

It is the doers rather than the idlers who generally balls things up. No war – as far as I know, has ever been instigated by those of a truly idle inclination. No meddlesome ideology, religion or political dogma has been cooked up and then forced fed to the masses by those that lie horizontally and watch the clouds go by.

It is said that the devil finds work for idle hands – I rather suspect that it is the opposite. I reckon the devil finds work for those who noisily, and self-importantly, flap their hands around desperately trying to get everyone else’s attention.

Bruce’s comedy novel ‘Losing the Plot’ is available on Amazon (written under the name of Archie Pelago).

RECOMMENDED

Jake Bugg
Tue 2 Apr 2024

Singer-songwriter Jake Bugg will be on stage at the O2 later this month as part of his mission to bring live music back to the heart of Britain’s communities and grassroots venues. He is currently touring the UK in his bid to reinvigorate the local music scene of some of the UK’s smaller cities and towns and took some time out to tell us more.

Paul Foot 3 wi4hf6
Tue 2 Apr 2024

Award-winning quirky and alternative comedian Paul Foot is returning to Oxford this month with his new show, Dissolve which is set to be his most vulnerable and honest yet. We got in touch to find out what we can expect from his performance at Oxford’s New Theatre, as well as – in very Paul Foot fashion – getting side-tracked by King  Tutankhamen, and what  Jesus might have  achieved if  he'd been a plumber...

Katie otb8tw
Fri 1 Mar 2024

This month, Katie Melua will be in Oxford, helping to launch the Oxford Literary Festival’s new Programme in Georgian Literature and Culture.

Namvula BBC Music nuyc98
Fri 1 Mar 2024

Described as having a diasporic upbringing, singer-songwriter Namvula is also a gifted photographer and was co-founder of Film Africa, a London-based celebration of African cinema and culture. She now lives in Oxford where she will be performing later this month at The North Wall.